Your website says to write to you with any questions or concerns, so here goes.
I came across your website one day and after reading the parable of the garden I felt like I was finally home. Like finally someone knew me. I immediately signed up for the email programs and downloaded the 2 free ebooks – the Great Awakening and the RSG to Authentic Spirituality. I don’t mind telling you that it took me some time to get through them all. I signed on, but life got in the way and it took me some time to settle down and focus.
I have always thought I was a little different, that there was something wrong with me because even though my entire family are born again Christians, it never set right with me. As I entered my twenties, I began to meet people that could also feel when there was someone else in the room, even tho you couldn’t see them. Some of them gave me some useful information. I took bits and pieces of information, whenever I needed to know something, the knowledge always seemed to fall into my lap from an external source. In the last two years, however, my spiritual life has taken on a whole new look.
Wow, this is hard.
Okay, lets just say that two years ago I began to feel like I was finally given permission to talk about the things I was feeling. Like I wasn’t the only one. My brother confessed to me one day that he was having spiritual experiences that were out of the realm of his previously devout Christianity. Having someone to talk to about this stuff was huge for me and was like the opening of a book. A couple of other family members came to me revealing the same types of things. I thought, okay, cool. I’m not alone and we are going to go through this together and it’s going to be all roses and rainbows. And I was good with it all. Up until about 6 months ago because that’s when it all began to fall apart on me.
Oh, don’t get me wrong, there are changes afoot, for sure. For me, though, I’m not sure I know how to describe it. Actually, I do. I feel like I’m the only one walking around with my blindfold all the way off. I’m reading the books I think I should be reading, and it is like reading something I’ve read before. Your books do feel like they are providing new information, but there again, as I’m reading, I’m waiting for new information. EVEN THOUGH I’VE NEVER READ ANYTHING LIKE THEM BEFORE. And the more I read, the more frustrated I get. like someone going, come on you know this shit already. What the heck are you waiting for…..
I am so frustrated!
But I’m not even really sure why. And it is beginning to affect almost every aspect of my life and relationships. I have to make some decisions regarding what I want to do with this next stage of my life (my youngest goes to kindergarten full time this fall, I’m currently a stay at home mom) and I have no clue. I can’t help feeling like I’m supposed to do something to do with the spiritual aspects of my life, but I have no idea what. Every option sounds doable, but none of them feel right.
And my kids, both are crystals, I’m pretty sure, both have different gifts, and I have no idea how to educate either of them. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a spirituality based parenting program that is not on the traditional religious path. And that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg. What am I saying. of course you do. My husband is not spiritual. He believes in God. He knows that me and the kids have certain gifts. He’s not not supportive. Just not interested, I guess. So it is just me.
So, I guess this is it in a nutshell: I have my blindfold all the way off. I have 2 kids that have spiritual education issues that I have no idea how to address. And, the biggest one is…..I feel so very, very alone in it all. But, giving it all up and putting the blindfold back on is not an option. And I have this feeling like I should know. Like I have a book that has all the answers to all these issues, my issues, I just can’t seem to get the damn book open.
And the answers aren’t in the lightning path forums. I already looked there. At least not the ones I have access to. No, I’m not a subscriber. I know you have some books for kids, but I feel like I need more than a book.
Anyway, thanks for listening. sometimes it helps just to get it out. And I apologize for some of the punctuation errors. My computer always gives me a hard time with the punctuation whenever I try to write anyone about spiritual stuff.
Signed, Frustrated and Concerned.
Dear frustrated and concerned.
As much as you might feel alone right now, you’re not. A lot of people express these sorts of sentiments to me. This is actually very common after people have read my books, and done the email lessons or registered as students of the LP. They clear some issues, they make some changes, consciousness enters the glass, and everything seems to be moving forward swimmingly until they come to this point where it is like they hit a brick wall. They know there’s more, they know they should be doing something, but they don’t know what it is and how they should move forward. It is a common lament, let me tell you.
So what do you do?
Well, my answer to this frustration and consternation is always the same. Start a Lightning Path reading group or, if you are uncomfortable with that, just start a spiritual reading group. There are lots of people out there like you who are wanting to do something. However behind you there are thousands, and pretty soon millions, who are looking for an authentic spiritual path home and many of them need a little help forward. It doesn’t have to be much. Post a pamphlet, book a room, recommend a book (or bring some yourself), and get people started. And don’t be nervous about it because, as you already know, at a deep level, you know this shit already. So calm your nerves and take some deep breaths. You know you want to do this, you know you have to do it (you can feel the pressure inside, can’t you?), you have the expertise (even if you aren’t fully aware yet) and frankly, it won’t be that hard to set up. The only obstacle is your own shame and self-doubt, i.e. that niggling feeling inside, put in there by your parents, your teachers, and other agents of The System, that you can’t do it, that you are not competent to be a leader, that you are not knowledgeable enough to claim authority, and so on. My only advice to you here is, get over it because you can do it. This isn’t your first time around the block after all. Of course, it will help if you commit (at least for a while) to The Lightning Path because there’s lot of information and materials to raise your confidence and spiritual expertise. There is also a small (but growing) selection of Lightworker Support materials that can help you organize reading and study groups (study guides, pamphlets, etc.). But that is not strictly necessary. That is, you don’t have to make the group an exclusive LP group (i.e. only using LP resources and book), just make a group.
You feel the pressure?
Respond to it!
?…burning desire to do something…?
I’ll be honest, that is the only way forward through the brick wall that has appeared in front of you now. You either respond to the pressure to act, or not. If you don’t respond, you won’t move any further. What’s worse, if you don’t respond to that inner urging then inevitably your body, your physical unit, will get tired of feeling frustrated and anxious and, despite your deep seated desire to stay awake and grounded in reality, nevertheless you will end up putting the blindfold back on and going back to sleep just to avoid the uncomfortable feeling you get from not honoring the wishes and intent of your higher, monadic self. In the end it it is your choice but if you want my bottom line advice, you know you got to do something, you know the quality of these materials, so just hunker down and get down to the business of being the Lightworker that you came here to be.
I am Michael Sharp